Don’t Look Back (G)
Characters – Hank the Ranger
Prompt - Kisses #3 Jolt
Word Count - 640
Summary – It was only one little kiss.
= = =
Don’t Look Back
The
more Hank thought about it, the more he didn’t understand. And he
wanted to understand. It seemed like the least he could do, now.
What had it been? He had asked that question before.
What should he have said? He didn’t know.
What had it been? He still didn’t have an answer.
Not a real answer anyway. He knew what it had seemed to be. It was a kiss.
It was a kiss.
It was a proper kiss. Their first kiss.
He should know what a kiss was, he had dreamt about it for long enough. It was a kiss, just a kiss.
Nothing more. That’s what he had told himself at the time. Nothing more than the barest of kisses.
The barest brushing of his lips against hers. It was like nothing else he’d ever felt in his life.
It
wasn’t as though he’d never kissed anyone before, or been kissed. But
it wasn’t the same. It was softer, it was warmer and more satisfying,
and it was filled with something he didn’t understand. It was
electrifying. Though their lips had touched for barely a fraction of a
second it felt like all the power of the Realm had been theirs, just
for that instant.
Were kisses supposed to be like
that? Was a kiss supposed to make him feel weak and powerful;
exhilarated and afraid, all at once?
Hank couldn’t stop thinking about it.
It was the one thing that he constantly came back to. He couldn’t help thinking about it, it was always in the forefront of his mind. It helped him, it sustained him, thinking about that kiss.
He hadn’t planned it.
He
was just as surprised as Sheila when it happened. It was a show of
friendship; he’d aimed for her cheek, but she had turned and tilted her
head up at just the wrong moment. Or was that the right moment? He
didn’t know. He could never be sure of her intent. And he couldn’t ask
her, now.
It was nothing… or at least it was meant to be nothing.
Or, at least he’d thought it was meant to be nothing.
His mind was filled with questions that he could never know the answer to.
The decision had been long made. He wasn’t about to change his mind and it wasn’t as if she’d asked him to.
She hadn’t said anything. Neither had he. But the kiss still lingered between them.
And now, when the chance had gone, he was consumed by the thought that perhaps things were meant to be different.
At
the start of their sojourn, he hadn’t dared say anything. It was too
dangerous, it wouldn’t have lasted. He was the Leader as well, letting
his feeling for her be known would have been too dangerous, and she had
her brother to take care of. He couldn’t complicate that situation. He
had to be the shining example, the big brother to them all: The Leader,
the one they all trusted. There could be no favouritism.
In
the darkness of the night he had let himself fantasise about what could
be when they all reached home. But he couldn’t let it happen. Not in
the Realm.
He had been the Leader.
But even that had ended, he couldn’t step away from the responsibility. He had never been able to do that.
He had been confident that it was the right thing to do.
And then…
And then came that kiss.
That kiss.
What had it been? He had asked that question before.
What should he have said? He didn’t know.
What had it been? He still didn’t have an answer.
What had it been?
It was a kiss. It was a proper kiss. Their first kiss. Their last kiss. Their only kiss.
And now she had gone home.